Eric Imhof wants no talk of how long the grass is...or anything other than the football, for that matter
“There’s a regulation maximum length but that was probably at the highest level. It’s no excuse though. We’ve had much worse, we’ve trained on cow fields in the past and still played good football.” Garry Monk
That’s an actual quote from Garry Monk following the 0-0 stalemate (stale being the operative syllable) at the Stadium of Light yesterday.
So that’s what it’s come to, eh? It was only four months ago that the Swans gaffer said, after being asked if it was annoying to lose the way they did against Southampton (via the cartoonish Ricky Lambert looper) in a “meaningless” match, i.e. after having already secured safety, that “no match is meaningless; we want to win every game.” I guess that quote should’ve come with a qualifier: “...and by every game I mean every game where the grass is cut to the exact length we have at The Liberty.”
Honestly, when I first read the phrase “long-grass gamesmanship” in the headline, I thought it was some kind of regionalism, or else a euphemism for nicking, fouling, stalling, etc. in order to not let a football match break out: as in, “they were pulling our shirts so much that it was as if they didn’t even cut the grass.” But no, Monk’s actually talking about the grass! I can’t wait until the next away game now, to see if Garry is out there with a ruler and a cylinder mower at half time.
It was fitting, too, that Ki had kind words to say about his former co-Black-Cats, considering that A) they seemed to be passing just fine through the undergrowth, and B) he was chasing players around like a confused child who’s lost his parents in a supermarket. I love that Ki is back, but I’m not sure if he just needs to play deeper or if he should come in for Gylfi later in games and let Shelvey (or Britton, hopefully soon) bolster the defense. Remember that Southampton’s goal a week ago was set up by Ki losing a step on his “mark”, if you can call it that, since Ki was completely turned around by a simple angular pass, as if an offensive player arriving on the flank was an unthinkable and miraculous fluke.
So that’s what it’s come to, eh? It was only four months ago that the Swans gaffer said, after being asked if it was annoying to lose the way they did against Southampton (via the cartoonish Ricky Lambert looper) in a “meaningless” match, i.e. after having already secured safety, that “no match is meaningless; we want to win every game.” I guess that quote should’ve come with a qualifier: “...and by every game I mean every game where the grass is cut to the exact length we have at The Liberty.”
Honestly, when I first read the phrase “long-grass gamesmanship” in the headline, I thought it was some kind of regionalism, or else a euphemism for nicking, fouling, stalling, etc. in order to not let a football match break out: as in, “they were pulling our shirts so much that it was as if they didn’t even cut the grass.” But no, Monk’s actually talking about the grass! I can’t wait until the next away game now, to see if Garry is out there with a ruler and a cylinder mower at half time.
It was fitting, too, that Ki had kind words to say about his former co-Black-Cats, considering that A) they seemed to be passing just fine through the undergrowth, and B) he was chasing players around like a confused child who’s lost his parents in a supermarket. I love that Ki is back, but I’m not sure if he just needs to play deeper or if he should come in for Gylfi later in games and let Shelvey (or Britton, hopefully soon) bolster the defense. Remember that Southampton’s goal a week ago was set up by Ki losing a step on his “mark”, if you can call it that, since Ki was completely turned around by a simple angular pass, as if an offensive player arriving on the flank was an unthinkable and miraculous fluke.
That’s all I’ll write about tactics for now, though, since I don’t want my analysis to get stuck in the weeds (sorry, had to). But bear with me, lest you think I’m turning into one of those overly critical grumps: I’d like to clarify that I only mention my eye roll over long-grass-gate because such excuses should seem slightly troubling to us highly reasonable Swansea supporters, if only because the headline gives the impression that the Swans are becoming a bit fastidious - if not downright petty (er, dare I write, barmy?), as if their early fifth-place position is going to their heads.
As an American trying to get others to even recognise my belovèd squad’s existence - let alone watch a match with me - media coverage is crucial in building the case, and the headlines from yesterday aren’t exactly helpful. Again, fittingly, Ki summed up yesterday’s slugfest well:
“A bit boring to be honest.” Ki
See, I love that about him: no excuses needed.
Furthermore, and more importantly, such equivocations bely everything endearing about the Swans: their dedication, their teamwork, their commitment to doing the little things right - in short, their humility. I don’t think Monk will ever approach Mourinho levels of theatrics, but why even get anywhere close? Just shake the other guy’s hand, say a point’s a point’s a point, and look ahead to the next match.
Furthermore, and more importantly, such equivocations bely everything endearing about the Swans: their dedication, their teamwork, their commitment to doing the little things right - in short, their humility. I don’t think Monk will ever approach Mourinho levels of theatrics, but why even get anywhere close? Just shake the other guy’s hand, say a point’s a point’s a point, and look ahead to the next match.
In this sense, Jonjo hit the nail on the head:
“I think on Tuesday night we performed really well against Everton and got a point today and we’ll just look to get three points next weekend against Newcastle.” Jonjo Shelvey
Who'd have thought Jonjo Shelvey would be the one imparting sage advice? Thanks to Eric for his latest piece - he runs @AustinJackArmy (a Twitter feed for fans of the Swans in Austin, Texas) - give them a follow!